CONFUZZZLEDDD.

new word :)
ugh dude so IDK WHAT TO DO MAN. like i wanna try for it, but i know im gonna get hurt in teh end, and yet i still wanna try. does that make sense? like blah ): its so scary, i guess, but ive been waiting SO long for this itsliek why not? but idk if youre just gonna turn your back on me liek last time. HELP ME. just tell me ): <3


anywhooo. (: i love alvin and the chipmunks < 3 its so cute omg SOOOO EFFING CUTEEE (:


i need a new man, maybe the one that im talking about up there, idk (: <3

bye (:

lately

i think im getting better from everything. so much shits been going on, but like im getting better. yesterday&today just MADE my whole break. i think.. haha X) like its been so hard , and then what YOU told me just made me like brighten up, and now i cant stop smiling :) <3

i hope we can start over. if youre reading this, i never let go, never will let go, and i love you (: <3

pahah. oh CRYSTALLLL LEEE, your comment made me SO happy (: <3 idk why.

hmm, so i needa start bloggin more, it makes me feel better. im at my cousins place right now, and im doign stupid homework -_-x i shoudlnt have procrastinated.

IM SO SAD, that imma be gone for new years eve, but lets make plans for new years someone! <3 cuhs imma make sure i come back in tim for that (=

my foots sleeping.

bye (:

yeah yeah yeah.

merry christmas! not so christmasy though. some holiday. spending it alone and not even with family -_-x dont you ever wonder why the fuckk some shit happens? yeah i do alot. im not realy in the christmas mood.
im at kays house right now and she is showering so im waiting for her <3(: heh i sound liek a creeeep.!

hmmm. like seirously. you. you cant tell me what to do. you cant control my life. so please dont act like youre such a great person cause you arent.

hey,. hey you. i think i kinda like you.. :o but im never gonna tell you because you just wouldnt look at me liek that! AWKWARDDDD. hahah (: i wish you would get a clue and notice.

if i didnt have you in my life, it would be meaningless, and dull, and id have no one to tp with and just enjoy life with no worries,.itd be like this blob of worries in my life if it werent for you and i thank god every day that i have a friend liek you <3

STOP CONFUSING ME. okay? one day youre in love with me the next day were just friends. its either it or not. god. some friend you are.

im glad we patched things up, i feel closer to you ever since.

youre a hyppocrite.

you werent even worth my time and ims orry i had to deal with your bullshit. im gonna find someone else and show you whatsup.


these were just to a few people (;
yeah some are harsh. its reality.

i realized my whole life ive been such a fucking push over. but im so sick of it. no more bullshit no more taking it as it is or letting people blame for what i dont deserve. im gonna be tough andim gonna do whati wanna do cuhs its my life. after this whole breakup thing ive gotten stronger and im glad. yeah i havent talked to anyone really about this break up, but whatevers its life and ill live and go on. im glad i figured it out now rather than later. once a cheater always a cheater as they say. okay. no more bitch. AHAHAH

(: merry christmas everyone <3

i sound so bipolar ><

<3 pck.

The way things are.

Yeah. i make my decisions and you make your decisions. and okay im sorry for whatever the fuck i did but hey i know what i did and im okay with it. becuase yeah maybe when people fight they can fight back but did you ever ask about my side? did you ask me h ow i feel. FOR ONCE in my life FOR ONCE id ecided i wanted to stand up for myself i wanted to be an individual not a follower who doesnt do b ad things , yeah. so i made the decision and i went through. and i know its wrong but you know what? i dont regret it because it made mehappy and it helped me let go.
and you know what? he can undo what i did he can wash it off he can brush it off he can clean it away and forget about it. CAN I? can i just brush off what he did to me,? can i jsut forget about it liek its nothing? can i just let go? I CANT and he can i didnt kill him i didnt CHEAT i did something thats erasable into his life. it didnt hurt him it didnt break his heart, because at least he didnt have to fucking see it happen in frontof his face. so yeah judge me say i did wrong, but atleast he can take back what id id. I CANT OKAY I JUST FUCKING CANT. and ive been scared tos ay it, BUT IT HURTS. so dont you dare say that im a bad person that you have no respect for me? well what about m y respect for you it hasnt diminished so yeah im sorry. but at least i didnt get mad at you and upset for something as little as thing. im a big girl and i can make my own decisions and if youre gonna make htat decision to dropt his friendship after how long? then okay. well im sorry but i dont deserve this caise i want to be happy and i deserve to be happy. and i will be happy no matter what you say. i want to be happy and i will be happy. no more having peopel step on me . okay? because ive been through shit and i k now what the fuck the world is so dont even act liek id ont know what the real world is.

Christmasss

im pretty excited! but i used all my money to buy shit -_-x.

i havent blogged in forever.

today i went shopping wiht my sister and i only had a few bucks -_-x i used it on a present ): boo hoo. heh but i got janelle one more thing today (: <3 cuhs i love you bitch! mm OH and my moms friend gave her 200 dollars to nordstroms and i used it to get a juicy couture necklace <3 im so happy i always wanted one ): and it was only 50! and i really wanted a wallet from there and it was on sale but NOOO my sister the bitch only let me use 50 -_-x holiday season is such a stressful se ason! even though it shouldnt be.

oh yeah and GET THE FUCK OUT BITCH. NO ONE FUCKIGN LIKES YOU SO WHY DO YOU INSIST ON ACTING LIEK THEY DO -_-X ugh., i hate wannabes. i also hate hyppocrites but we cant help but live with them.

so much shittt -_______________-x im glad i have peer counselign to vent to people.